obsess much

I had a dream about Mariska last night. I've had a few before, but this was the first time where I actually talked to her. Apparently, I'm nothing like my real self in my dreams, because I went straight up to her in this one. The details are starting to fade but I remember being at some play/movie thing and looking behind me and seeing her sitting next to Peter. It could have been the Golden Globes since I had heard of her nomination earlier in the day. The next thing I remember is sitting right next to her and saying that we had the same color on, which still leaves me with a big WTF because it was like a teal-ish color. She was in a dress of course but I had on some sweater thingy and I only wear sweat shirts. Again this is all weird and I don't know what our conversation consisted of, but I remember asking her for an autograph and her signing something for me. OH, something just came to me, haha. She was asking me about college and when I will turn 21. I said not till March and she said something to the extent of "you must be so excited" to which I responded with "I don't drink". She said she respected that and something about not seeing many college kids having the willpower to do so. She then wrote something about keeping up my GPA with her autograph. All of this was happening during an intermission and as soon as I tried to leave, the lights went dim and I swore. Something like "Ah, fuck. I can't leave now" and she laughed.

- First off, why am I at an event that she is? I'm from North Da-fuckin-kota. 
- I would so not go right up to her. I'd hide behind something and ogle her for the whole night.
- I would not stay calm, I'd be a blubbering mess.
- Even if I did go up to her, I don't think I'd utter a single word.
- I definitely wouldn't be wearing anything matching hers, because I'm not that fortunate or cool.
- I seriously plopped my ass right next to her and leaned over like I was Hilary Swank. Ah, no no. Would never, ever dream of it.
- Would she even talk to me if I did? She'd be repulsed, I know it. I'm sure she can sense a fangirl freak from a mile away.
- We made small talk. For serious. She asked me questions.
- and I made her laugh. I'm completely baffled.

So, you can about imagine the kind of state I woke up in this morning. Very confused but also very happy. I made her laugh in my dream. That is something I've only been dreaming of for years now and while it serves as a rude remider for how I will never be able to experience her in real life, it still feels pretty damn good.